10 Stupid Things We Do During A Relationship Fight

by Reception Chronicles

We’ve all had them.  Fighting with your significant other is not something we enjoy yet for some reason instead of trying to resolve it as soon as possible, we drag it out for a few hours or even a few days.  It can be from a small argument to a massive blow out but the aftermath is usually the same.  From my personal experience and those of other’s, I give to you the 10 stupid things we do during a relationship fight.

1. THE SILENT CAR

The silent car is a distinct sign of a fight aftermath.  Instead of listening to talk radio or playing music,  a couple will sit in complete silence.  It tends to thicken the awkward atmosphere and adds to the stubbornness of each individual.  Each are thinking “God this is awkward but I am NOT touching that radio” believing that it will claim defeat leaving the other with more stubborn will power.  It should be noted if any speaking does occur, it is most likely going to be criticizing of the driver’s skills on the road.

2. THE RESTAURANT STAND OFF

A restaurant is the perfect place for two fighting gunslingers to duke it out at the table.  It can go two ways.  The first is sitting throughout the entire experience in silence while staring around the restaurant or pretending to be very interested in the design of the forks/glasses/plates.  It is taken to another level if the awkward funk is so bad that people sitting around you and the waiter picks up on it.  The second way is having a full on argument at the table in a public arena rather than in the confines of your home.  It provides witnesses in your argument and entertainment for guests of the restaurant. Win win.

3. THE MUMBLE JUMBLES

During the aftermath of a fight, it is common to reduce your speech down to an intentional mumble.  This act frustrates your partner knowing full well you will have to repeat your self.  It gives the mumbler an opportunity to repeat the statement with slow exaggeration in order to think ‘do they ever listen?’ and the other to think ‘how did I end up with this moron?’  As the fight begins to die down, speaking levels return to normal.

4. THE WHATTT

This action is the usual response to the Mumble Jumbles.  Instead of saying excuse me/sorry/what when responding to the mumbler, the partner says what while pronouncing every letter of the word and ends it with a harsh TTTT slap in the face.  The T is the most effective way to pull off this manuever.  The sharper the T, the harder the slap.  Don’t forget that T!

5. THE ANGRY BUTTERFLY

I think we can all agree that the worst time during a couple fight is at night getting into bed.  During the good times, couples cuddle up and slip into a happy slumber with their significant other.  During a fight, it is a war zone.  Instead of falling asleep together, both individuals sleep with their backs to each other and forms the shape of, in this case, an angry butterfly.  You spend the entire night mumbling curses and minor threats to yourself.  At rare times, one might say goodnight but they might as well be saying good-ihateyou-night.  If the couple survives the night, it is made worse in the morning if one has to leave for work because they usually leave without saying a goodbye and the other is left flabbergasted at this notion.  What did you expect?

6. DRAINING THE RESOURCES

When in a relationship, we learn to accommodate for two.  When fighting in a relationship, we drain each others resources.  Instead of making coffee for two, you make enough for one.  If your first in the shower, you wait until all the hot water is gone then exit. There are so many ways to drain each others resources so get creative with it!

7. MISGUIDED SWEETNESS

This is a nice way to keep instigating an ongoing fight.  You continue to act unpleasant toward each yet around friends or family, you express an over the top sweetness and friendliness for one reason only.  To shove it in the face of your significant other.  Once the masquerade is over, its back to Funk Town.

8. MAGNETIC REPELLENTS

It is so nice to stroll together and hold hands during happy times in a relationship.  During the aftermath of a fight, it is as if the couple has placed opposing magnets to their sides.  The goal is to walk as far away from each other as possible to further your awkwardness.  If for some reason you become to close, you bounce away again.  Don’t walk too far away from each other or else people won’t notice your in a fighting funk.

9. THE CAST AWAY

There is nothing more irritating then fighting or having an awkward funk over the phone. This may lead to the Cast Away which is total refusal of call/text contact.  Your phone could be ringing and you think ‘i’ll get to it later, let’s make him/her sweat a bit’ knowing very well that every ring that goes by increases the anger level of the caller.  It’s not that you don’t want to speak, it’s a sign of willpower, control and winning.  Once the phone calls and texts stop, this may cause the Cast Away to believe ‘i bet they don’t care if I fall off a cliff, the insensitive monster.’  This may lead to a communication cut stand off.

10. THE PMS FACTOR

The PMS factor is the Pandora’s Box in the relationship fight.  It should only be used if in critical circumstances, to advance a fight, or if you have scientific and medical research to back it up.  If a guy takes this drastic step of claiming the fight might be a cause of PMS from the girl, be prepared to back it up and be armed with a cup and some sort of shield (especially if it is true).

It is a great time when the awkwardness passes and the fight ceases to exist.  It is back to normal life of being happy and enjoying each other’s company.  From my experience, no matter how healthy and happy a couple can be, we never learn.

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